Since 1929, the sort of people that wear cravats without irony have driven their unutterably exclusive cars to The Concorso D'Eleganza Villa d'Este in Italy. Other men arrange them into categories then judge which is best. The collective result is knee-weakening.
This year's event, held at the Grand Hotel Villa d'Este on the banks of Lake Como, featured several machines we'd merrily trade our manparts for. All of which are available for your delectation in this gallery. Click forth, TopGear.commer...
Images courtesy of Concorso d’Eleganza Villa d'Este.
Aston's study in awesomeness, which you can see more of here, scooped the Concorso d'Eleganza Award for Concept Cars and Prototypes.
Some fine vintage metal in the Closed for Comfort and Open Sky categories. From left to right: 1933 Rolls-Royce Phantom II, 1935 Delage D8 105 S, 1935 Rolls-Royce Phantom II, 1935 Lincoln K Series V12, 1937 Bugatti, 57 Ventoux, 1938 Delage, D8 120 S, 1938 Talbot-Lago, T23, 1942 Alfa Romeo, 6C 2500 SS, 1932 Rolls-Royce, 20/25, 1932 Alfa Romeo, 8C 2300 and 1933 Delage D8 S.
Some familiar faces in the Concept Cars & Prototypes class. From left to right: 2011 Italdesign Giugiaro, GO!, 2011 BMW 328, 2011 Infiniti Etherea, 2010 Mercedes-Benz Concept Shooting Brake, 2010 Audi Quattro Concept, , Aston Martin Zagato V12, 2011 Scuderia Cameron Glickenhaus P4/5, 2010 Renault DeZir, Mini Rocketman, 2011 Rinspeed Bamboo.
In the Post War Racing Icons class this 1965 Ford GT40 MkII (left) - the very same model that won Le Mans in '66 - took on a World Touring Car Championship-winning 1966 Abarth 1300 OT.
Clive Joy from the UK won the Birth of the Supercar category with a mouth-watering 1968 Alfa Romeo 33 Stradale. He won't swap it for used body parts. We checked.
BMW paraded its old and new BMW 328 – the original Touring Coupe still holds the record for the highest average speed on the Mille Miglia and it's 75 years old this year, hence the new 'un. See more of the 2011 concept here.
Christina Hendricks, or Joan off of that Mad Men program, helps dole out the Most Elegant Rolls-Royce Award, which went to the 1933 Phantom II.
This 1942 Alfa Romeo 6C 2500 SS had a dangerously high density of gorgeousness per cubic centre. It also won the Best of Show by Public Referendum gong.
Villa d'Este's Birth of the Supercar category. From left to right: 1970 Lamborghini Miura S, 1968 Ferrari 275 GTB/4, 1968 Alfa Romeo 33 Stradale, 1963 Aston Martin DB4 GT, 1962 Ferrari 250 GT SWB and the very same 1961 Jaguar E-Type that appeared on the launch pad in Geneva.
This 1938 Talbot-Lago T23's got Coupé Royal coachwork from pre-war Parisian company Figoni & Falaschi. Value? Somewhere around £1.5m.
Introduced in 1954 as a two-seat tin-top sportster, the 300SL (300 for the three-litre displacement, SL for Sport Light) got gull-wing doors, as copied by the new SLS. Its German owner, Heiko Seekamp, won Best Preserved Post-War Car Award with it.
Now-defunct French manufacturer, Delage, fitted its gloriously Art Deco Autobineau Coupé with a 3.5-litre eight-cylinder engine that produced 105bhp. Not bad considering it was manufactured in 1935. Owned by Alex Vazeos from Greece, it was entered into the Closed for Comfort class.
This is one of 23 Lamborghini 400GTs built. Essentially it's a 350GT with a bored-out 3929cc V12, which makes 320bhp. And this 1966 model, entered by Dietmar Götz into the Swinging Sixties category, is one of the first built.
When the Talbot T26 Grand Sport was manufactured back in 1948, it was one of the most powerful cars on the planet - the engine and chassis came from the T26C Grand Prix car, which also won the Le Mans 24 Hour. It‘s got a 4.5-litre straight-six mill, which is good for 125mph. Its German owner, Friedhelm Loh, entered it into the Fifties Chic category.
Italian engine, French everything else - what could possibly go wrong? Not a lot, actually. Even though the Citroen SM used a Maserati V6 to power its hydraulically suspended, front-wheel drive SM, it was a huge success. Shame the 1973 oil crisis decimated sales. Its Dutch owner, Harrie Brunklaus, entered this one in the Masters of Creativity Class.
This Jaguar XKSS was entered into the Fifties Chic class. It's a road-going version of Jag's legendary D-Type racer. Steve McQueen had one. ‘Nuff said.
Siata was an Italian tuning shop founded in 1926. And this - entered into the Small Car Big Performance category - is the 400F. It's powered by a Fiat 2-litre 8V engine and is one of 35 produced. Steve McQueen had one of these, too.
Another entrant to the Swinging Sixties category, this painfully awesome 250GT is built in oversteery short wheelbase flavour. We're tremendously jealous of its Swiss owner, Jean-Pierre Slavic.
Funny to think that Abarth started life as a performance exhaust company in 1949. Eventually, it made a few cars, including this - one of three Abarth 205 Monzas. This one was raced in the 1950 Mille Miglia wearing exposed aluminum bodywork, which was painted silver as part of a three-year nut-and-bolt restoration. Its German owner, Klaus Edel, entered it into the Small Car Big Performance category.
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